As men we are constantly bombarded with decisions that demand a response. The challenge for many is to see that there may be more than just the two options presented...there may be a third way. Although many may think I am refering to politics, lets take a real life scenario that may be presented to a father in a properly patriarchal family: sports. What is a father to do when deciding how much his children will be involved in sports?
One might see that there are two options, either my children play in organized sports or they do not. If they do, that means practices and games which may conflict with family meals and religious observances. If the children are not involved in sports, well, they may be deprived of the physical outlet for excess energy and the learning experience of playing on a team. These two options are all many parents will ever consider. But wait, could there be a third or fourth option?
Let's face it, many of us just don't put the effort into thinking through these things until we learn that our child learned some new four letter words or worse yet, was exposed to some evil on a peer's cell phone while traveling with the team. We seem to be more concerned with being perceived as overprotective or controlling by other parents than holding a true standard of goodness in our homes. God forbid that our child would be deprived of the great learning experience of playing tee-ball!!!
So what is a father to do? The decision always has to start with our eternal goal in mind. What benefit is this to my child's soul and eternal salvation? What is the effect on the child's soul by opting out? The next step is to face our own insecurity and baggage - Why do I want my child to play midget football? Why do I feel like I am neglecting my child's welfare by choosing to not enroll him in the local soccer league? While this sports discussion is just an example, this decision making process goes for most every decision related to my family's welfare. Do I make decisions for the eternal good of all or am I earth-bound and making decisions based on worldly concerns?
Of course, the really hard part is facing the consequences of our decisions. Am I seeing my college-age child distancing himself from the faith because of his sports performance anxieties? Am I able to embrace the cross of children playing around the house, rather than farming them out to some volunteer soccer coach?