"Adolescence is the most intensive and potentially profitable period of growth in a man's life. It is a time of physical transformation, growth, and surging emotions that is properly paralleled by the development of the boy's moral powers of self-governance....Those in charge of his formation, the father foremost, must adopt an attitude that views the youth as an apprentice and initiate to manhood." TMM, Dilsaver
As fathers, if we accept this understanding that adolescence is the time of apprenticeship for manhood, we understand that we should, at all times, offer a truly integrated model of manhood to our sons and the young men around us. If we tell our boys, "Do as I say, not as I do", we are foolish to believe that they will actually do what we say. In fact, these young men will develop a keen awareness of those areas in our lives that are not lived faithfully. They will see these facades and learn to imitate them. In other words, the sins of the father, will become the sins of the son, and sometimes in a worse way.
With this understanding, adult men must strive to live lives that are authentic and worth being modeled. If we think our son's are going to turn out "better" than us, just because we want them to be better, we are fooling ourselves. So we must ask ourselves, "Is my life worth being imitated by my son?"
If the answer to that last question is in the negative, we have to ask ourselves...what do we need to change and how?!